Bullying

By Mallory Langford

What is bullying?

When adolescents are in elementary and middle/junior high school much of what they do is dependent upon the reaction they will get from their peers, teachers, family and parents. That is one explanation for bullying in schools. Before students at the elementary age know right from wrong, they may bully in order to get attention. By the time they are in middle/junior high school they have a better sense of what is right and what is wrong, but they may still feel the need to garner attention. They may see it as a way to get what they want or as a way to act out their frustration. In other cases, it is a reflection of how they are treated at home or at their previous school. It is not something they are born with; it is something they have learned. Often, bullies rise out of being bullied themselves. But, in any case, bullying is something done with purpose.

Why?

There are many reasons that bullies act the way they do. Both bullying and being bullied are associated with key violence-related behaviors (carrying weapons, fighting, sustaining injuries from fighting).

Characteristics of a bully:

• Strong need to dominate and subdue other students to get their own way
• Impulsive and easily angered
• Defiant and aggressive toward adults (parents and teachers)
• Show little empathy toward students who are victimized
• If they are boys, they are physically stronger than other boys, in general

Some causes of bullying may be:

• Being made fun of
• Subject of rumors
• Pushed, shoved, tripped, spit on

There are underlying reasons for bullying.

• Bullies see it as a way to become popular
• Making themselves look tough and in charge
• To get attention or other things
• To make other people afraid of them
• Jealousy
• They are a victim themselves

As grade level increases, the likelihood of being bullied decreases.



How to prevent and stop it

One problem with bullying is that the victims or witnesses of the bullying may be afraid to report it to an authority figure. They may feel a number of things: they won’t be safe, they may be betraying someone, and they are intimidated to tell the truth. An easy way to work around these fears is the comfort of anonymity. Many schools have started using something called a “bully box”. Students can put notes in the box that will say what they may be too afraid to.

Also, buddy programs are helpful. The guidance of older students, and the connection to someone who has recently been in their shoes, can be a confidence builder for younger students. It also gives the younger students a confidant, since they may feel more comfortable talking to someone around their age.

There can be school-wide efforts to stop bullying. Something like a “no bullying day” can be a big help.

For more one-on-one help, counseling is a productive option. Counseling by a trained professional can help not only the student being bullied, but also the student doing the bullying.

Peer mediation is a creative problem solver. This is a good way to involve other students in constructive problem solving and also a way for the students with the problem to work through their issue without feeling intimidated by a school authority figure.

Tips:

• Verbal acknowledgment
• One-on-one conversations with both the bully and the bullied
• Make it clear to the bully there will be repercussions for continued behavior
• Follow up with the bullied and make sure they know who they can talk to about the current situation or future situations

N.A. (October 2007). No Bullying Circle. Retrieved March 3, 2008, from http://staff.harrisonburg.k12.va.us/~jgamble/No%20Bullying%20circle.gif/.